Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Why are people saying that Trump is fat when he is an athletic 6 foot 3 and 215 pounds?

The sadness was still there.

And the sadness?

I was tired of trying and failing.

What are 5 ways that can be done by the community to improve the public transport system?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

Be who you already are.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Who is the most annoying character in the Office?

You are like me, then.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

WhatsApp is adding ads to the Status screen - TechCrunch

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

It’s still here.

What is your favourite colour and why?

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

I had run out of hope.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Time (physics): Who started counting our current time or is it just "set" by some scientific measure?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Unvaccinated cat in St. Johns County prompts 60-day rabies alert - News4JAX

It’s here now, writing to you.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Why do creationists ask for proof of evolution and then ignore the answers?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

I was tired of fighting.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

What does a passable feminine crossdresser look like?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.